Before taking Dora for a walk this morning, I decided to combine this everyday task with another that I have been lax with lately, daily devotions. I grabbed my phone and did an app search for audio devotions. The search came up blank. I did a search for an audio bible and found an NIV and downloaded it. On an electronic success high, I snagged my Bluetooth headset and flicked it on. Remembering it had to have a blinking blue light to indicate synchronization, I began pressing and holding buttons. No blinking blue light. I rooted through our stack of manuals, no Bluetooth headset manual. Dora, sitting at the back door, ceased being excited by the prospect of a walk. Her wary expression warned me of emitting some very bad vibes and possibly some colorful language. Giving up on electronic nirvana, we headed out the door.
Tuning out of our routine of walk, sniff, squat, walk, sniff and walk some more; I began thinking about the lost devotions. Bright idea number two for the day. I could have my own bible reading using memory. I started with the 23rd Psalm. I got stuck at “my cup overflows”. Two more recitations and still stuck at the same place. Vowing a brush up on memorization, I decided to work out the next scene for my book. I visualized my main character and willed her to give me some dialogue. She remained mute. I brought in other cast members and willed them to interact. They refused to move or speak. I felt a headache build in my temples and start beating a bass drum at the back of my neck. Oh, joy, all my characters are on strike and standing around drinking coffee on my dime. I don’t have a simple writer’s block, I am shooting writer’s blanks.
Punching in the garage door key I realized my only accomplishments were to get the dog panting and me seething. Oh, please tell me all you writers out there have similar problems. Please tell me you too shoot writers blanks and have selective amnesia?. If not, I may be doomed to a career as a dog walker.